Trudy: Back to the Vet -- Again

While I recognize that veterinary medicine is a challenge due to many factors, most of all -- your patients cannot speak -- I am finding it difficult today reconciling why we cannot find a cocktail of approaches which will help Trudy. 

For every good day we have, we have 5 bad days.

I haven't slept in two days, neither has Hubby. Trudy screams (no exaggeration) at least 3-4 times a night for the past few days and at least that many times during the day. The heating pad no longer provides comfort and when she has an episode she has taken to biting us. I think this is the hardest part. We treat our animals like they are our children, but I realized today that she is -- in fact -- an animal who acts on instinct and lashes out at any other animal or human in her attempt to flee pain. It is absolutely the most heartbreaking situation I have encountered. 

I cannot comfort her, I cannot hold her, I cannot kiss her head. I am her "mother", yet I am not because she is a dog, but try telling my heart that.